Parenting
Coordination is a child-centered dispute resolution service
that assists parents in developing
and implementing workable parenting plans
when they are unable to do so on their own.
A Parenting
Coordinator is a highly skilled neutral with knowledge and
experience
in conflict resolution, child development,
family systems and domestic violence.
Parenting Coordination helps:
- Reduce conflict between parents.
- Reduce chronic litigation (and preserve
family resources).
- Raise parents’ skill level in collaborative
planning and decision making for their children.
- Assist parents in co-parenting in a way
that promotes the well being of their children.
To reach these objectives, the Parenting Coordinator
serves several important functions:
-
Assessment:
The Parenting Coordinator
gathers information
in order to assess:
the
impasses that derail
communication and
decision making
parenting
strengths, weaknesses, and co-parenting
skills
the children’s functioning
and
needs
The Parenting Coordinator
may do this by reviewing
written evaluations and reports,
and talking with other significant
individuals involved with
the family (doctors, therapists,
school personnel, lawyers,
etc.) The Parenting
Coordinator may meet with
the parents individually
or jointly, and communicate
by telephone, fax and email. The
Parenting Coordinator may
decide that it would be helpful
to meet with the children.
-
Education:
The Parenting Coordinator
provides important information and assistance
regarding:
- child development
- short and long term needs
of the children
- the effects of conflict
on children
- family issues (e.g., transitions,
new relationships, blended
families)
- communication skills
- collaboration strategies
- problem solving options
-
Intervention and Conflict Management:
The central tasks of
the parenting coordinator are to:
- identify, clarify, articulate
and organize the areas of
disagreement
- facilitate productive communication
on these issues
- assist in brainstorming
options, including those
offered by experts involved
with the family
- guide a negotiating process
which maintains a focus on
the needs of the children
- make decisions for the
parents when they are unable
to come to agreement
The Parenting Coordinator
does not make custody recommendations
or decisions. Custody recommendations
are made by a guardian ad litem and custody
decisions are made by the Court. With
those limitations, the scope of issues
addressed by the Parenting Coordinator
is still wide.
Issues include:
- Healthcare management including
medical, dental, orthodontic
and mental health care
- education or daycare including
school choice, tutoring,
participation in special
education programs, and other
major educational decisions
- extracurricular activities
including camps, teams, and jobs
- religious observances
and education including time,
place and logistics
- time share/visitation schedule including
children’s travel,
vacations, holidays and variations
from the usual schedule
- transitions/exchanges
of the children including
date, time, place and transportation
- decisions about children’s
personal possessions, including clothing
and equipment
- communication between the
parents about the children
including telephone, fax
and email
- decisions regarding alteration
of appearance of the children
including haircuts, ear and
body piercing, tattoos
It is not surprising that when parents divorce and
set up separate households, they also establish different
household rules and lifestyles. These differences are often
the focus of conflict. Parents may hold different
beliefs around the supervision of children and disciplinary
interventions, around homework, etc. Conflicts also
arise around parental dating and the role of significant
new partners. Problems may come with the creation
of step families and blended families.
While the most immediate goal of the Parenting
Coordination is to resolve pressing issues and
disagreements, the long term goal is to provide
parents with the understanding and skills necessary
to be able to resolve future disagreements on their
own.
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